Max's Entry

Introducing...

Maxwell Khalil Ahmad Raines

Born November 13, 2015

1:28 am

Bogota, Colombia

7.3 pounds 21 inches long

And oh so handsome!

In the days following Max’s birth I found myself wanting to linger in the details. While nursing him in those first few days, I would replay his birth in my mind and when Fuad and I had a few private moments when both boys were asleep, we would talk about his birth and how it felt to bring this life into the world.

It’s not really fair to compare the arrivals of my two sons, but it’s hard not to...For reference, you can read about Dylan’s birth story here.

Like Dylan, Max also took about 24 hours to exit the womb. He kept me waiting, not too long, but long enough, as his due date was November 7th. Since Dylan came 2 weeks early, I kept hoping Max would come early too, but he came at exactly 40 weeks, 6 days after his due date.

The first contractions came in the very early morning hours and felt so different from what I experienced with Dylan that I spent at least 30 minutes looking up the difference between Braxton Hicks contractions and the “real thing”. I spent the early morning hours experiencing these contractions by myself. I had been sleeping in Dylan’s bed because I was so uncomfortable and needed so many pillows. Eventually, I woke Fuad up to let him know...it’s happening!

I was in labor all day, with just a brief pause in the mid-morning. It felt like I labored all over, starting at home, then in my doctor’s office, then in the waiting area of the ER, in the restaurant where we had lunch, in the park, and finally in the delivery room.

Here's the Timeline: 
Around 3am Thursday, November 12th, contractions started.

Noon- I went to an appointment for fetal monitoring-results showed moderate contractions  3 minutes apart.

1:20 pm-Appointment with my OB (Ana Lucia)-exam shows I’m dilated 1 centimeter and she’s concerned that my blood pressure is high. She asks me to head to the ER (which is right across the street) for blood work and urine tests.

3:00 pm-left the ER to wait for the results (we were asked to come back in 2 hours). We had lunch and walked to the park.

5:00 pm Back to the ER. Everything looks fine with the tests, more fetal monitoring, we got checked into the hospital. Had a comical exchange with the pain guy, who was in total shock and surprised that I didn’t want any pain management.

7:00 pm -We finally make it up to our room, where our doula Isabel meets us and we get to work with labor. I think at this point we’re dilated 3 centimeters.

10:00 pm-Ana Lucia returns to check in, she’s off to deliver a c-section and will come back when she’s done.

11:00 pm-Ana Lucia checks in once more and fetal monitoring shows a potential problem. She explains her concern that the cord is potentially wrapped around his neck and she offers 2 solutions, that we deliver c-section or she ruptures the membrane (the water still hadn’t broke) to check that the fluid is clear. She gets a 2nd opinion from the ER Doc and he agrees. We decided to rupture the membrane, at this point I’m dilated 5 cm, the fluid turns out to be clear (thank goodness!) and I quickly begin to labor much faster! Within minutes I’m dilated to 7 centimeters, contractions are flowing one right into the next and all of the sudden I’m left alone to labor while my “team” leaves to change into scrubs for the delivery which will take place on a different floor in the OR.

Now I’m in heavy labor and we're moving beds, going downstairs in the hospital elevator where I'm placed in a common room with other women laboring while the OR is prepared.

I start to feel like I’m going to pass out...I’m super thirsty...At this point my husband says to me “I want to tell you that you’re a badass”, which makes me smile every time I think about it. Ana Lucia steps away to wash her hands and I feel the urge to push, I can feel his head coming out, they move me really fast (legs wide open for the world to see) I yell “he’s going back in!!!” We get to the OR, and in 2 quick pushes he’s out! I didn’t even get to move to the delivery bed until after the cord had been cut.

It turns out the cord was wrapped around his neck twice and was tangled up in his hands. He came out the most horrifying shade of purple, all the way down to his toes.

I delivered my son Max completely naturally, with no drugs involved, and I’m proud of that. It’s what I wanted. There is no experience like it in the world. In fact, writing this birth “story” I’m at a loss for words to truly describe the experience. It’s a flooding of sensation and waves of pain that result in the most expansive feeling of love you can imagine.

My husband says it over and over, the female body is amazing...the male body doesn’t do anything close to what a woman does while pregnant, and then through the labor process and then nursing.

I find myself wanting to linger in these early days of bliss, I'm falling in love all over again. This time around, I know what to expect, and I know that it does go fast. I especially love the moments when I’m nursing Max and Dylan wants to cuddle up next to us. It moves me to the point of tears. I want to box up those moments, for I know that far too soon, they will be teenagers.

Day 1, just about to leave the hospital

Dylan holding his new baby brother for the first time...